Financing a wedding?

How do people usually pay for a wedding? I'm getting married in a little over a yr from now and I'm feeling overwhelmed. Unless you knew you were going to marry since you were born i don't think anyone saves for this occasion, do they? We have some money saved but would rather not spend all our savings on the wedding although we do want it to be a great wedding. We are completely financing the wedding ourselves so no outside help. Do people have to pay all expenses, reception site, caterers, photographers, florist, all up front or do they allow you to make payments up to or even after the event? Do people take out loans? I don't borrow money from friends or family so that is NOT an option. If I invest what i have in aggresive stocks I may come out with nothing in this crazy economy. HELP!

Financing a wedding?
Yes, all places will require an up-front, non-refundable deposit and require payment in full a week before the wedding.





As the last poster said, find a place to save - make coffee at home; don't go out to each lunch/dinner, etc. Cash in your recyclables (bottles, cans, newspapers). Commute to work with others to save gas (carpool).





How big a wedding do you want to have? Is the ceremony more important or the reception (assuming you had to choose between the two)? How many guests do you plan to have? How many bridesmaids/groomsmen?





If you have a wedding on a Friday evening or Sunday, it's usually 1/3 to 1/2 the price of a wedding on Saturday. You can rent the gown, rather than buy. Florist - you can always get flowers from Costco or the grocery store (they are a lot cheaper than a wedding florist).
Reply:Lots of parents save for their children's weddings, but I would guess that more take out loans when the time comes. This is not a good idea. People borrow thousands of dollars for an event that lasts a few hours, when the reality is that you can have a very nice wedding for very little money. I have four adult children and each wedding was handled a little bit differently. The wedding should be for you and your fiance, not for a couple of hundred people that will have a nice time and then promptly forget it. My advice to you is to have a very small wedding at someone's home. Invite only your family and very best friends. Use cut flowers from someone's garden or the supermarket to decorate the house - lots of them. If your family and friends are willing and eager, have someone make your cake. Get married in the summer and have a an elegant picnic for your reception Have your friends take the photos and movies. Spend the bulk of your money on what is important to you, perhaps some good musicians, a beautiful dress, a nice honeymoon. In answer to your questions, florists, caterers, etc., often expect a down-payment with the balance being due just prior to the ceremony. If you do decide to take out a loan, remember that professional florists and photographers are often the largest expense. If you have not already done do, go to the site, theknot.com. I understand that there is lots of info there.
Reply:We just figured out how much the two of us already had saved, and how much we could spend along the way. We were engaged formally eight months, but knew we were getting married for longer than that. So it was just a matter of making a list, and figuring out a budget - the style of the wedding and the number of guests were then determined by that. Some things you need to pay up front, other things you just need to put a deposit down on.


Don't take out a loan or use credit cards. Only have the type of wedding the two of you can comfortably afford.
Reply:My fiance and I are pretty much paying for everything ourselves also. We set a date, i had about 6-7months to pay for the wedding. Usually recept.sites,photo.florist have you put down a down payment. and most is due 1-2wks before the wedding date. We pretty much have most of it paid for. My mom helped out with our $400 wedding cake,our best man chipped in a few hundred to pay for the ring,and our maid of honor paid for some things.(if anyone helps you out,you might want to mention in your speech a "special thank you" to them. Some take out a loan if your fiances can't afford everything.
Reply:My first piece of advice is to not have a more expensive wedding than you can afford. It really is crazy to take out a loan on an event that has no after-the-fact monetary value. So, decide what you can spend and then build the wedding around that.





For us, we're doing a number of things to pay for our wedding, like:


1. using some of our savings (but not draining our accounts)


2. I took on a part-time job, all of the net pay that will go into the wedding fund


3. I sold the motorcycle I rarely rode anymore


4. Any money that we save using coupons and store discount cards goes into the wedding fund (when I get home from the grocery store, I look at the receipt, and if it says I saved $7.81 in coupons and preferred savings, I put $8 into the wedding jar). You will be amazed at how quickly this adds up, and it's pretty painless. We also throw in any extra cash we might have (we're being more careful about not buying lunches out, cooking meals at home, not buying soda and snacks from vending machines, stuff like that).


5. Any rebates or reimbursements we get (like the medical spending accounts at work) go into the wedding fund


6. I sold all the jewelry that old boyfriends had given me (it somehow seemed right to use that money to pay for a wedding to another man!)


7. we'll use our tax refunds next spring for whatever we haven't saved otherwise.


8. we're making our invitations, programs, centerpieces, favors, and my veil, saving hundreds of dollars


9. we've also negotiated with our vendors. The DJ gave us a discount because he's very familiar with our venue and already has a good working relationship with the staff there, knows how things go, the room set-up, etc., so it's an easier job for him ($150 saved). We also negotiated a package with our photographer because her standard package didn't fit our needs ($250 saved). We worked with the catering manager to develop a customized menu for dinner at a lower cost than the standard options ($600 saved). Look for things like that--these few rate reductions saves us $1000.





All vendors will expect to be paid in full by the day of the wedding. Some vendors will let you pay as you go, but I don't recommend you do that. Instead, open a bank account specifically for your wedding expenses (this also helps you track expenses). Keep your money in this fund rather than giving it to vendors. First, you'll earn a little interest on it, but more importantly, should there be a problem (a vendor issue or the wedding has to be cancelled or postponed, for example), you don't have to fight the vendor to get your money back. Give them only the amount required as a deposit, and wait until the last day specified in your contracts to pay the rest. It's not that you expect to run into a problem, but unexpected things do happen, and you don't want to be fighting with vendors on top of whatever the problem was.





So, plan carefully, save faithfully and spend wisely.
Reply:Why spend your life savings on one day? It is your day, do what you want and don't worry about appearances. Have an afternoon, outdoor wedding with finger foods and appetizers instead of a sit down meal. Have a close friends and immediate family only, this will save TONS of money. There is way too much emphasis put on the wedding and not nearly enough on the marriage. Have something small and casual and if people don't like it, who cares, it is your life. You are not here to please others.
Reply:please take this advice kip it Small but nice


and yes you can make payments as you go along don't let it get over your head on expenses you can have a real nice and beautiful wedding with out going broke=now


the reception site have to be reserve 1year before and you need to pay half now and the rest a week before your wedding= the caterers look for them now so they will have time to make arraignments for your Wedding you have to make a list of the people that you will be inviting but the most Important is the reception hall and remember the smaller the more beautiful
Reply:in most cases the brides parents pay. since you don't have that, go for something small and simple...why be in debt for 10 years for one day of party?
Reply:Dont go over board on a wedding. I know its a big day but it can lead to financial disaster. Plan a small wedding, have family members all bring a food dish to help out with the reception, have a friend take the pics. You can have a good wedding and have a cheap on that will look good. It would be crazy to take out a loan for a wedding but people do it all the time. Dont start your marriage off in debt. You do know that the biggest reason for divorce is over money right?
Reply:pay in cash, most venues will require full payment by the date of wedding, but u could pay as u go if u start now,
Reply:we paid for our wedding ourselves, too. most expenses we paid up front (reception hall, food, photographer, etc.). i know a friend who took out a loan for her wedding. the wedding was posh, but they divorced before they finished repaying the loan.


we saved a lot of money by doing things ourselves and cutting out "extras." also, even though you don't want to borrow money from friends/family, they can be a lot of help. my sister (an artist) made my table centerpieces with junk we bought from a second hand store. one of my friends did my and my bridesmaid's hair and nails. one of my brothers (an accomplished guitar player) did the special music.


we splurged on the photographer--after all, what's the point of spending $1000's on a wedding and having no good photos of the people who were there.


word to the wise: if you're having a friend dj your reception, make sure he knows what he's doing. :-) that was the only black mark on the whole day (he began our first dance with "sexyback" by justin timberlake instead of the song i'd selected--turned out he didn't have any of the songs i'd selected so he'd conveniently substituted them with his own choices. loads of fun.).
Reply:1. Under no circumstances do you go into debt for a wedding or use your entire nest egg. Of course it's important, but the reality is it's only 24 hours tops and has no value to get a return on your money. Most divorces are caused because of money issues so don't start yourself off on the wrong foot.





2. With most wedding vendors they will let you put down deposits and pay later, however you do have to have it all paid by the day of the event. It's not like financing a car, if they work wedding day and you decide to screw them over they have nothing to take back. They can't ask your guests to puke up the food, or unexpose the film.....





You have a few options.





a. You can get a second job on the weekends to raise funds





b. Trim some of the fat from your budget. That morning starbucks at $5 each....well do the math. 5x7= $35 a week. 4 weeks in a month and you suddenly have saved $140. 12 months out of the year and you have $1,680 saved! Other little things like switching from name brand to store brand at the gocery store, cleaning out the garage and having a sale can all add up much quicker than you think.
Reply:Remember this: you have the rest of your life to be in debt for things that really matter over the course of a lifetime, such as medical care, a decent home, solid transportation, a child's education, etc. The size of the wedding has absolutely nothing to do with whether it will be a great wedding or not, that is all attitude. Take a percentage of your savings and spend it on the things that are most important to you and the groom. You will be happier in the long run. And yes, all the people out there encouraging you to spend more and more, like photographers, florists, dress designers, reception halls, caterers are in it for the money and they know very well that once the wedding is over people are not going to want to still be paying for them so they all require payment in full prior to the event..... some months in advance. Digging yourselves a financial hole to be stuck in as you start your marriage is a recipe for trouble and nothing else. For pictures, ask a friend who takes nice pictures with a digital camera to take a few before and after the ceremony. Put disposable cameras on a couple of the guest tables with a note to please take a few pics and pass them around. Ask family to take as many pictures as they want and share them with you. Our daughter paid a professional and regretted it... she liked the pictures her Aunt and I got much better than the ones from the pro! I would suggest checking the clearance racks at places like David's Bridal for your gown and any attendants, as well as limiting the number of attendants to 1 or 2. A nice suit already in the closet is great for the groom... everybody does not have to be a perfect match to look good in pictures!Remember, you will be causing expense for them and you will be expected to give them a gift of appreciation as well. Consider involving close friends and family to help you pull off a reception. The traditional halls aren't the only places around, maybe a friend or relative has an awesome backyard. My family has pulled off a few awesome receptions by enlisting those who cook well to cook up batches of foods and freezing them until needed. At this point, all you need is a bunch of borrowed crock pots and maybe a few chafing dishes and folks willing to get the buffet set up for you. I can honestly say the food at these receptions was miles above catered ones I have been to. The cake. Little known fact. If you go to a baker who makes wedding cakes and occasion cakes (birthdays, etc) and ask for wedding cake, you will pay dollars per guest, at a minimum overall cost of at least $700 - and that is a conservative estimate. BUT, if you have someone willing to assemble the pieces together for you (way easy and lots of how to books around) then you ask for birthday cake with just the white icing and simple trim and build your own..... the cost to you will literally be hundreds of dollars less, (around $100 - $150) and for more cake! Add the purchased topper and some pretty bows or flowers and you have a gorgeous wedding cake! Be creative. For example, my daughter loves dragon flies so I bought a pack of four for a dollar, painted their wings white and glued each to a white painted toothpick and inserted strategically among the flowers and acorns (pre coated with polyurethane) we put on the cake and ta da!!! One hint: think out how to keep the topper upright if it is top heavy or narrow near the bottom (a dowel up the statue and down the cake works well). Her guests were very impressed. A friend who loves flowers assembled the bouquet and buttoneers (and there are tons of how to books for flowers as well). Use in season fresh flowers - they cost less. Quality silk flowers can be found cheap by watching the seasonal clearance tables at craft stores. Inexpensive garlands dressed up with a few nice silk flowers are every bit as beautiful as the ones you'd normally pay $24.99 a piece for. Picnic shelters are reasonable and can be decorated and work well for a more casual, homey feeling wedding and reception. Most of all, keep reminding yourself of all the things you have desperately wanted throughout your life and of how little their actual enjoyment quotient turned out to be when compared to the cost and stress spent obtaining them. The wedding is just the opening scene for the rest of your life.
Reply:Pay for your wedding cash, up front. As PSpoptart said, do not go into debt over your wedding!!! And do not spend a significant part of your savings. Budget only what you can comfortably afford. She had good post with some good options for raising and saving money. It's far more important to have money saved up for a down payment on a house, emergencies, etc.





The typical wedding in the U.S. averages $28,000. You by no means need to spend anywhere near that. If you can't afford a wedding with a paid reception site, caterers, etc. like you said, then you're far better off having a smaller wedding at a restaurant or even a backyard BBQ or potluck at someone's house. Your MARRIAGE is far more important than the wedding.





FWIW, I'm saving money by: not having any attendants, wearing a cocktail dress instead of a wedding gown (it's my second wedding), groom wearing his own suit instead of a tux, not having it video taped, having the same location for wedding and reception (no limo rental). If I need to save even more money, I would have a DJ instead of a live band. If I needed to save still more money, I would have fewer guests and/or do one of the options I mentioned above.
Reply:Weddings are as expensive as you make them. If you want a big wedding it will be expensive and parents/family usually contribute to some of the costs of the wedding. As you have said you're paying for it your self you will need to start saving.





The alternative is that you can have a small wedding with only close friends and family.





Most place I know want a booking fee and then the whole amount for booking a location for the wedding and reception.





Loans are not a good idea as you don't want to start you married life by getting into debt.





If you love each other that's all that counts and a small wedding will be all you need so it won't break the bank.





The stock market is crazy right now so its a high risk.
Reply:Very simple. You establish a budget and plan within that budget. Do your homework and plan carefully and you can have a beautiful wedding without spending your life's savings.





Just a few money-saving ideas:





Limit the guest list. You don't have to invite every person you've ever met. Keep it to those closest to you.





If space allows, have the wedding at home with a casual dinner to follow. You can have it catered, or you can probably recruit family members to prepare the food (aunts and grandmothers are always a great resource for delicious meals!).





Find a friend or relative who is a photographer (either professional or hobbyist) to do the photography for a discounted price.





Limit the amount of flowers for decorations. Nobody really pays much attention to them anyway and they're very expensive. (I was just at wedding yesterday that had NO flowers for decorations. The only flowers at the church were already there for the regular seasonal decorations and they only used candles and tulle at the reception. And it was a beautiful wedding.)





Good luck with your planning and best wishes on your upcoming marriage!
Reply:You should not spend every dime you have on a wedding. You finance a home. You finance a car, but you don't finance a 5 hour party for 20 year-olds, unless you've bumped your head. Your best option would be to keep the thing small. Have a destination wedding or a small, intimate wedding reception in a restaurant.
Reply:Here is how i recommend my couples come up with their wedding budget:


1. Take the amount you can each put aside out of every paycheck,


2. Take the amount you will get from family and friends,


3. Take the amount you are willing to put on credit cards,


4. Add those %26amp; that's your budget.





Some of those numbers may be zero, and that's okay. I don't usually recommend taking out loans or putting very much on credit cards, b/c this will only start your marriage out in debt. Debt causes stress,and you don't need any more stress when you are first starting out.





Most vendors will take a minimal deposit or a deposit of half the total cost up front to either place orders or hold your date. You can usually pay the other half out along the way or wait to pay the balance til about 1-2 weeks before the wedding. I don't know any wedding vendors who will take money after the event. That would not be good business for them.